You take a woman out to dinner and everything seems to go fine. After dinner, she seems to be more distant. She doesn’t seem that interested in you even though the conversation went well. It doesn’t look like a second date for you. What went wrong? I asked women: When going on a dinner date with a man, what kind of gentlemanly manners do you expect? Some Responders:

"How a man treats a woman is actually a reflection of what he feels about himself. I would not want a man that practices poor manners anymore than I would want a man who feels that women are somehow inferior to a man. That is someone who has deep-seated problems on more than one level."

"I don't expect for a man to help me sit, but it's appreciated (i.e. pull out the chair), but I do expect good table manners, and for him to actually listen if I'm talking. If I don't reach to open a door, I would like for him to open it, but if I do reach to open it, it's not as though I expected him to do so, and hold it against him. It's really important that he doesn't talk about himself all night, unless I'm asking questions. Basically I just want common courtesy; don't talk about/look at other women, belch, or otherwise act crass."

"Opening the restaurant door, getting the wait staff attention if I need anything. Table manners? Not chewing with a mouth full, no loud burping at the table, no cell phone calls, paying the bill, opening the vehicle door."

"Pick me up, compliment me, open doors for me, and don’t order for me. I would be highly offended. I am capable of ordering for myself."

Although some women don’t see a need for it in this day and age, many, many women still do expect these things. Ask the women around you (not your dates) if they see it as a turn on? It might be because so few men out there actually do those things anymore. Here’s another small gesture, when you choose a seat, let the women take the seat facing the interior of the restaurant while you face the wall.


by William Edwards